004 ✚ voice, plus filters

[crumbled]

[the feed starts with a slight clearing of his throat.]

To those who were-- worried --about me last week. Yukio replaced my stitches and I'm fine now.

[uhhh.

there was a thanks here, but it got cut--]

Thanks.

[--off. or not.]

[FILTERED TO EXORCISTS (ALMA, LAVI, KANDA, ALLEN, LENALEE, CROSS, AND.. THAT ONE TYKI.. and Link sure. prolly hackable but why would you want to, there's nothing to hear.]

I'll talk.

If you'll listen.

[the pains in his arm and head peaked out a few days ago and as been declining steadily ever since. he doesn't know if it'll stop completely at some point (only to start back up again) but it's at a manageable (functional) level now and he'll take advantage of it.

it's story time, comrades.]

[/END FILTER]

Comments

[voice]

[doctor_dragoon]

Are the new stitches holding up alright?

[voice]

[crumbled]

Nothing professional, but they'll do.

[that's a yes.]

[voice]

[doctor_dragoon]

[Frowning behind his audio feed. His stitches are very professional, thank you very much, but he doesn't let any irritation leak into his voice.]

I'm glad to hear it.

[video]

[alma_karma]

... You're really okay now? [SCRUTINIZING... nothing. Because there's no video. But damn it, if there were, he'd be looking SO HARD.]

[video]

[crumbled]

[OKAY WELL

WELL



VIDEO FOR YOU ALMA, OKAY.]

..Yeah. I'm okay now.

[video]

[alma_karma]

[YAAAAAAAAY!

Alma looks relieved.] I'm glad.

1/3 [AUDIO; same filter]

[tothelastbreath]

['Yukio; stitches'

It's a new bullet point automatically added to Allen's ever-lengthening mental list of things to do, people to keep in mind.

Even as most of him is preoccupied with why the hell 'llujah would need not just stitches, but stitches to be replaced so he's only 'fine now', a small part of him functioning on autopilot notes he'll have to thank Yukio properly on 'llujah's behalf—]

2/3 [AUDIO; same filter]

[tothelastbreath]

[—or not. Hrm. Would you look at that.]

3/3 [AUDIO; same filter]

[tothelastbreath]

[Then the feed switches to filtered and pushes all concerns about social niceties (you'd be surprised at how much they can ease things along in conditions like these, sir) to the back of his mind. During the course of his stay in Nesreca, Allen has offered time and again, to various people, to listen if they would talk. It's a little strange to hear it in reverse now, but that doesn't mean the sentiment doesn't still stand.

A quick check to be sure the feed is filtered, then he's tapping twice on his PDA to make his presence known, a habit he's picked up here.]

I'm here.

[No is this really alright's or are you sure's. Whether he's from another reality or not, this is still Kanda. Of course he's sure. And if he is, then Allen had better match him.]

[AUDIO; same filter]

[crumbled]

[see Allen? 'llujah is capable of himself. he knows how to be grateful.

sometimes.

truth be told, it would've been a better idea to do this during the week of silence (also known as the week when no one could do jack shit), but that was too soon. and he wanted to enjoy that actually. all good times come to and end, after all.]

You are. [something of a rhetorical statement meant more for himself than anything. in his room, he has his back against a wall, knees drawn up and arms resting on them, PDA lying nearby on the bed. watching the door.

he has to start small, but that's too hard, so he'll go with the most relevant first.]

..You've been gone for four years. I haven't seen you in two.

[voice; filtered]

[beanstalk]

It... might be easier, though a bit troublesome, to do it one-on-one than gathering everyone up in one room.

[He. might have some experience with this. (unsure)....]

[voice; filtered]

[crumbled]

I'm not gathering anyone up in any room. Over the network will be fine.

[no face time!! this is a touchy and difficult enough subject to broach over the PDA as it is, doing it in person won't help much at all.]

[voice; filtered]

[beanstalk]

Whatever works for you, Kanda.

[voice]

[0sacred-blame0.livejournal.com]

I'm glad to hear you're okay, but are you sure you don't need healing?

[voice]

[crumbled]

I can heal myself now that our powers are back.

[reaction] 1/2

[killedyuu]

[Stitches... Since when do either of them need stitches... What kind of wound won't close even with their healing..?]

[video || same filter] 2/2

[killedyuu]

[So "soon" was now? ... Alma feels a bit nervous--but he wants to know... what would have happened... if Alma hadn't killed his best friend?]

I'll listen.

... Thank you. [For being willing to tell them.]

[action] 1/3 I TL;DR'd hnnnghhhh...

[setalight]

[She'd meant it, you know. When she said she'd be waiting for that explanation. She just hadn't thought it would happen like this; hearing things like 'surgical implants' and 'dead' and 'you've been gone for four years' and 'they brought you back?' mentioned over feeds that include her, but aren't entirely meant to.

You all really are awful at filtering feeds that ought to be privated.

Somewhere between Allen locking his feed and Alma starting his, Lenalee finds herself on her feet, clutching the PDA in both hands as if she could silence the awful if she only clenched it tight enough. If her heart would beat loud enough that it'd drown everything out.

To be fair, it's not a conscious decision that leads her to 'llujah's floor. It's just something she does, like going to search for Allen in the middle of the night because she had a bad dream and a bad feeling. It doesn't even really occur to her that she's seeking him out until she comes to herself standing in front of a door that says "Kanda Yuu" and sweating ice.

She reaches for the knob, feeling oddly detached for a moment, almost as if she were watching herself outstretch her hand from far away, without any say in whether or not it's a good idea to. As her fingertips touch the metal, she falters and presses her forehead to the door instead, eyes closed. She can hear him. Can hear the double-echo as he speaks to the others, words passing from his lips to the network.

The PDA dangles at her side, turned on for the sake of maybe, maybe convincing her to say something— if she can get her voice around the knot in her throat. If she doesn't speak up, Kanda will get suspicious.

But if she does, he'll know she's...]

Hah...

[Lenalee dries a building of tears with a rough, frustrated pass of her free hand, pinches the bridge of her nose, and stares at the PDA through slitted eyes.]

[action] 2/3 and now I fail at html...

[setalight]

[And a few minutes later, in Alma's feed— one of the few that hasn't yet been locked from her prying— motivation to speak up comes across so sharply that she goes a little numb.

"So... they brought you back.. again."

(There's those words again— why do they keep coming up—)

"They.. tried to seal up my memories again, but it didn't work."

...

'Again', again.

She can't breathe.]

[text; private] 3/3

[setalight]

[New text message

To: Yuu Kanda

(What is she doing? All she has to do is reach out and turn the knob—

God, no.)

Her fingers slips over the keys so badly that correcting her errors frustrates her to near-tears.]

what do you mean 'brought you bakc'? again? your memories? kanda

[Once the "Message Sent" notification appears onscreen, she presses her hand flat to the door. Maybe it'll stop shaking. It feels like she's holding her breath (has been holding it until she's lightheaded), but she isn't. She really isn't.]

text; private

[outsidehistory]

[Lavi is quiet for long moments after reading what goes on first in Allen's conversation, then his Kanda and the older Alma's once that feed all but disappears. He's reminded of the stories that Kanda told them, the regeneration, Lenalee's shortened version of events that painted a more horrific story. And again he almost breaks down.

Why?

Why did everyone invested in this war have to have such terrible things done to them or waiting in store? It was worse for them than he had seen for so many other fighters in countless other wars. But this... "Holy" war was beginning to seem so unholy that he was sure they were all in Hell - if it did exist - and this was their torture for eternity.

Not even in other timelines could they get a break.

Lavi runs a hand through his hair and instead of going to audio or video like the others he switches to a text, automatically putting it on private. Really he would rather go talk to Kanda in person, but it seemed as if the other wanted to be alone while he told his tale.]

You don't have to tell me anything, you've made it clear that you prefer not to tell a Bookman what happened. However, I had thought we were friends, at least we are in my home. And if we are or were in yours, either way I would never record it. As a friend I would never share such things told in confidence.

voice; private 1/2

[crumbled]

[prefer not to tell a Bookman

that wasn't.. the problem. he isn't sure if his misunderstanding can or should be cleared up, or if it's just what Lavi wants to believe. 'llujah doesn't know anymore, it's--

it's been far too long. only two years, perhaps. but add in one death, one botched memory-sealing spell, experiments, a dozen more bouquets of water lillies and a whirlwind of memories too blurry to make out, and he's left clinging onto whatever scraps of Lavi he can still recall from what seems like an eternity ago.]

You. [level, firm, but wavering as much as a single hissed syllable can. that could be attributed to the fact that he's actually holding the PDA, as it gripping it will do any good.] You.

[I had thought we were friends

banters and rabbits, braids and death threats, sparring, draping, joking, laughing

if we are or were in yours

he doesn't know what to see Lavi as anymore.]

voice; private

[crumbled]

[he feels like he's overreacting-- and maybe he is. and maybe Lavi is an idiot, maybe he's just as frustrated as 'llujah is, maybe

maybe

they can.]

You're an idiot, Lavi..

[this whole thing building up after the first few weeks in Nesreca is tiring, avoiding Lavi, respdonding curtly, awkwardly, he hates making or using excuses, because

because]

I don't care if you record it, I don't care if you listen as a friend or as an Apprentice. Stop being such a dumbass.

[he's the one who's been pushing Lavi away.

it's pretty damn hard trying to go back to how it used to be.]

[Voice ; Private]

[wineandwomen.livejournal.com]

Talk about what? Are you finally coming out of the closet as they say?

[All he knows about.. Other Kanda here is that he's different and has stitches. Interaction with him has been minimal at best.]

[Voice ; Private]

[crumbled]

[YOU, SIR, HAVE THE BEST TIMING.

BY BEST I MEAN WORST.

AND BY WORST I MEAN 'llujah is still suffering from stupid-Lavi-syndrome and is currently gritting his teeth like Johnny does trying to pull a cork out of a bottle, only less red in the face and with more of an eyetwitch.

what even.]

I am not in a closet, sir.

[just

why is he talking about closets all of a sudden...]